How to sleep train while contact napping
If you’re reading this, chances are you're a sleep-deprived mum holding your baby while they snooze peacefully on your chest—again. You love these moments of closeness, but you also wonder if your child will ever sleep independently, and if you'll ever get a break. The good news? You can work on sleep training without giving up contact naps right away. It’s possible to balance the need for connection with gently guiding your baby towards independent sleep.
This post is for all the exhausted mums who are not quite ready to let go of contact naps but want to start laying the foundation for better sleep habits. Let’s explore how!
What is contact napping?
Contact napping is when your baby naps on you—usually while you’re sitting or lying down. For many mums, this feels natural and comforting, especially in the early months. It’s a bonding experience, and it can help babies feel secure and calm.
However, as your baby grows, you might start wondering how to transition them to sleeping on their own. This is where sleep training comes into play—but don’t worry, you don’t have to abandon contact naps cold turkey!
Understanding sleep training
Sleep training is simply teaching your child how to fall asleep on their own and stay asleep for longer stretches. It doesn’t have to mean letting them “cry it out” or suddenly removing all forms of comfort. Sleep training can be gentle, gradual, and tailored to your baby’s (and your) needs.
Contrary to common belief, sleep training doesn’t mean you have to stop everything you’ve been doing to comfort your child. If contact naps are still working for you and your baby, you can ease into sleep training while respecting their need for closeness.
Can you sleep train and still contact nap?
Yes! It’s possible to gently introduce sleep training techniques while maintaining contact naps for part (or all) of the day. Here’s how:
Start by focussing on night-time sleep
Contact napping can be emotionally rewarding, but it can be physically exhausting if you’re doing it around the clock. A great place to begin sleep training is by focusing on night-time sleep. During the night, try gradually shifting your baby to sleep in their cot, using a technique that feels right for your family—whether that’s staying with them until they fall asleep, gently patting them, or using a more structured sleep training approach.Create a consistent sleep routine
Babies thrive on routine. Establishing a calming pre-sleep routine will signal to your baby that it’s time to rest. This can include activities like a warm bath, soft lullabies, and dimming the lights. Even if your baby is still contact napping during the day, having a routine helps them understand the process of falling asleep. Over time, they’ll start recognising these cues, which will make sleep training smoother.Incorporate independent sleep skills gradually
While contact napping, you can begin to introduce gentle, independent sleep habits. For example, if your baby tends to fall asleep while feeding, try separating feeding from sleeping by 5-10 minutes. You can still hold them during this time, but over time, they’ll learn not to rely on feeding to fall asleep.Similarly, you can practice putting them down for a short period after they fall asleep on you. If they wake up, pick them up again—this is a slow and responsive approach, but it helps your baby gradually get used to sleeping in their own space without feeling abandoned.
Shift to cot naps gradually
Once your baby has made progress with night-time sleep or starts sleeping longer stretches independently, you can begin experimenting with one nap a day in their cot. Start with the nap you think your baby is most likely to manage without being on you. For many babies, this is the morning nap. This doesn’t mean you need to cut out contact naps entirely, but alternating between contact naps and cot naps can help ease the transition.Stay responsive and flexible
Remember that sleep training is not about following strict rules—it’s about helping your baby learn to sleep independently in a way that respects both their needs and yours. It’s perfectly okay to keep offering contact naps if they’re still working for you, especially during those fussy periods or growth spurts. Sleep training can be a slow process, and being flexible helps it feel less overwhelming.
Why this gentle approach works
Sleep training doesn’t need to be an all-or-nothing process. By slowly introducing independent sleep skills while maintaining contact naps, you can:
Preserve your bond: Contact naps can be a special time for bonding, and there's no need to give that up before you’re ready.
Reduce stress: For both you and your baby, taking a gradual approach reduces the stress of sudden changes. Babies thrive on routine, but they also need time to adjust to new sleep patterns.
Adapt to your baby’s needs: Every baby is different. Some may be ready to sleep independently at an earlier age, while others may need more time and support. A gentle approach allows you to meet your baby where they are, while still working toward more independent sleep.
When to consider moving away from contact napping
As much as we love cuddling our little ones, there may come a time when contact naps become less feasible—whether it’s because your baby has become a light sleeper or because you need more hands-free time during the day. If you’re ready to fully transition your baby to independent naps, here are some signs to look out for:
Your baby seems restless or wakes up easily when napping on you.
You’re feeling overwhelmed or exhausted and need more time to rest yourself.
Your baby is consistently sleeping longer stretches at night, showing they can handle longer periods of independent sleep.
Final thoughts
Sleep training and contact napping don’t have to be at odds. You can introduce healthy sleep habits while continuing to enjoy those precious cuddles. The key is to take a gradual, gentle approach that respects your baby’s individual needs and your desire for connection. With patience, consistency, and flexibility, you can help your baby build the skills they need for independent sleep—while still holding onto the moments that matter.
If you’re feeling unsure about how to begin, remember: you don’t have to do it alone! As a sleep consultant, I’m here to guide you every step of the way, offering tailored support to help both you and your baby get the rest you need.